I just talked to one of the loveliest people in my life.
A dear friend since my freshmen year of college when we did crazy funny things together.
A woman who has faced a lot in life and in past relationships and very recently has been blessed with a man that matches her perfectly!
I can't get over it! And I can't get over my excitement for her. She's persevered through a lot and this blessing is spilling over.
It's always sweet to see close friends experiencing joy and happiness. Something good. It is possible that those moments of joy and perfection still exist. I love knowing their joy, anyone, whether it's following a lifelong dream or falling in love or making peace with something in their past. Tiny glimpses of hope which remind me to not let the darkness and dullness of day to day life ever erase my passion and joy.
Most of all, I love talking to my friends, the ones I've known for two or more years on the phone and laughing and talking together. I have always been odd about the friends I stay in touch with. They tend to be not drama-ish and real and honest. They tend to see me for what I am and love me in ways I couldn't ask or expect. It just works. They know my past and some of my struggles, but it doesn't get in the way of how they view me. Those friends I stay in contact with just get me.
And yet at the same time, each of them are so different than the other! No two of my good friends are anything at all alike and the variations and colors that their personalities offer bring me such interesting perspectives and joy. It's like, having children and loving each one because they all have something different and unique to offer. Except having way good friends.
In any case. It's refreshing to talk to old friends and I appreciate their effort to remain in contact with me especially when they're busy or tired or sad or don't like talking on the phone. Their voices remind me of winds of love. Love that washes across miles and phones and days and years. Love that strikes a deep chord of familiarity and a sort of being in tune with other people that helps you remember you aren't quite alone. That in itself is nothing short of amazing.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Reunited
Yesterday was a joyous day of being reunited with a pair of workable roller blades!
we took my worn out blades to a sports store and I got a new pack of wheels which the guys there put on the blades for me.
of course, they broke off one of the bearings in the wheel, they put all the wheels on one of the blades and then asked me if the wheels were too loose (they were missing the spacers, causing the wheels to move back and forth in ways which could have been dangerous. What would have taken about 20 minutes took an hour.
Included in this is the fact that my man decided he should buy some sweet blades so he could come skating with me (note: he hasn't skated in any form for a very long time, I've been skating in blade form for a very long time).
We got home and I was itching to try out these new wheels and he wanted to see what it was like to skate. I got on and zoomed around, he got on and well, did his best to zoom around. All in all, it was an interesting experience. It's always strange when you can do something really well and then someone else feels disappointed because they can't do it as well. Even though you've worked at that particular thing for a very long amount of time. That's what I tried to make sure he knew, I didn't pick up blading in a day, i am as good as I am because I've done it for years.
I always feel free when I skate. There's no limits and no one to tell me how to do it.
It's like eating green eggs and ham, I would skate with anyone or alone, anywhere or at home.
Where I live the flat land is at least good for something,
I missed the many trails and sidewalks when I was in NC
People there just didn't seem to bike or go trail walking as much.
To bike on the road seemed dangerous to me as the speed limits were 45 miles an hour near my neighborhood. I didn't feel comfortable having cars go around me at those speeds.
All this to say,
Welcome back closet rollerblader. Freedom to live is here.
we took my worn out blades to a sports store and I got a new pack of wheels which the guys there put on the blades for me.
of course, they broke off one of the bearings in the wheel, they put all the wheels on one of the blades and then asked me if the wheels were too loose (they were missing the spacers, causing the wheels to move back and forth in ways which could have been dangerous. What would have taken about 20 minutes took an hour.
Included in this is the fact that my man decided he should buy some sweet blades so he could come skating with me (note: he hasn't skated in any form for a very long time, I've been skating in blade form for a very long time).
We got home and I was itching to try out these new wheels and he wanted to see what it was like to skate. I got on and zoomed around, he got on and well, did his best to zoom around. All in all, it was an interesting experience. It's always strange when you can do something really well and then someone else feels disappointed because they can't do it as well. Even though you've worked at that particular thing for a very long amount of time. That's what I tried to make sure he knew, I didn't pick up blading in a day, i am as good as I am because I've done it for years.
I always feel free when I skate. There's no limits and no one to tell me how to do it.
It's like eating green eggs and ham, I would skate with anyone or alone, anywhere or at home.
Where I live the flat land is at least good for something,
I missed the many trails and sidewalks when I was in NC
People there just didn't seem to bike or go trail walking as much.
To bike on the road seemed dangerous to me as the speed limits were 45 miles an hour near my neighborhood. I didn't feel comfortable having cars go around me at those speeds.
All this to say,
Welcome back closet rollerblader. Freedom to live is here.
Monday, March 16, 2009
In search of the Other Side: Green
I've been thinking a lot about the grass greener on the other side idea.
I suppose it's quite easy to be tempted to think that a this instead of that would somehow make all the difference to your level of happiness.
I sometimes find myself guilty of this in my relationship. Not because I don't like this, but sometimes me taking this for granted tempts me to consider what that must be like.
For example,
We were driving back to my place from having run some errands and he had to work so I was thinking he'd prob. just want to go to my place and chill/relax. This thought bummed me out b/c it was a beautiful day. I mean lovely. It's funny, b/c in this state all the hibernating people suddenly turn out in droves on the sidewalks, on their bikes, and in their lawns once a semi-warm day hits. It's great. It was one of those days. And it kinda bummed me out to go back so I mentioned taking a walk. He mentioned he'd be walking around all night at work. But that he wouldn't mind sitting outside somewhere. Discouraged, I dropped the issue thinking we'd head back. In my grass greener mind I thought, man, wouldn't it be nice if I had a guy who would just pull over as soon as I mentioned the idea.
Well. I have officially decided I'm on the green grass b/c that's exactly what he did. We took an unexpected turn and I said, where we goin? and he said, I thought you wanted to go to a park? I said, I thought you didn't want to walk around. He said, I don't but we could walk to a bench and sit down and chat. Wow. Talk about me getting my eyes of that other side (which I suspect really has brown grass). And back onto my own sweet man.
Never mind that the bench he was thinking of was much further down the trail than suspected. And that most of the trail we walked was still covered in snow/slush.
It's in those little tiny things. Perhaps people would have less affairs or less relational problems if instead of turning a blind ear to each other, we listened to each other, and not only listened but acted swiftly on their words. Instead of giving and taking, what if we focused on the giving and left ourselves to feel surprised in the receiving?
I never expected or really asked for anyone to love me. And even when my eyes wander over to that other grass, it usually only takes a moment for me to realize I'm already on it.
In other words: I really like this side of things.
I suppose it's quite easy to be tempted to think that a this instead of that would somehow make all the difference to your level of happiness.
I sometimes find myself guilty of this in my relationship. Not because I don't like this, but sometimes me taking this for granted tempts me to consider what that must be like.
For example,
We were driving back to my place from having run some errands and he had to work so I was thinking he'd prob. just want to go to my place and chill/relax. This thought bummed me out b/c it was a beautiful day. I mean lovely. It's funny, b/c in this state all the hibernating people suddenly turn out in droves on the sidewalks, on their bikes, and in their lawns once a semi-warm day hits. It's great. It was one of those days. And it kinda bummed me out to go back so I mentioned taking a walk. He mentioned he'd be walking around all night at work. But that he wouldn't mind sitting outside somewhere. Discouraged, I dropped the issue thinking we'd head back. In my grass greener mind I thought, man, wouldn't it be nice if I had a guy who would just pull over as soon as I mentioned the idea.
Well. I have officially decided I'm on the green grass b/c that's exactly what he did. We took an unexpected turn and I said, where we goin? and he said, I thought you wanted to go to a park? I said, I thought you didn't want to walk around. He said, I don't but we could walk to a bench and sit down and chat. Wow. Talk about me getting my eyes of that other side (which I suspect really has brown grass). And back onto my own sweet man.
Never mind that the bench he was thinking of was much further down the trail than suspected. And that most of the trail we walked was still covered in snow/slush.
It's in those little tiny things. Perhaps people would have less affairs or less relational problems if instead of turning a blind ear to each other, we listened to each other, and not only listened but acted swiftly on their words. Instead of giving and taking, what if we focused on the giving and left ourselves to feel surprised in the receiving?
I never expected or really asked for anyone to love me. And even when my eyes wander over to that other grass, it usually only takes a moment for me to realize I'm already on it.
In other words: I really like this side of things.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Weary
Sigh.
Sometimes this job wears me down.
Some days I'm on top of my game and the kids and I have a really great day.
But there's other days when the weariness of what I'm doing causes to wake up with much hesitation. New classroom. New group of kids. Who knows what they will be like or what stuff they will try and pull with me.
I've had many classes that I've really enjoyed.
And also met many very responsible and respectful students. The unfortunate side of that coin is every teacher tends to remember the problem kids more than the good ones.
Perhaps today I am just worn out.
Sometimes this job wears me down.
Some days I'm on top of my game and the kids and I have a really great day.
But there's other days when the weariness of what I'm doing causes to wake up with much hesitation. New classroom. New group of kids. Who knows what they will be like or what stuff they will try and pull with me.
I've had many classes that I've really enjoyed.
And also met many very responsible and respectful students. The unfortunate side of that coin is every teacher tends to remember the problem kids more than the good ones.
Perhaps today I am just worn out.
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