voice in the desert. Hope.

You once called him
"The voice of one calling out in the desert"
Where are You?
I feel and see a weariness in my spirit.
I want to save the world and be
That voice.
I see my friends going places unsafe
Tears run down for them
As I fear for them every night.
I know I'm not their Savior
But then again,
Who is?
I'm trying so hard to find You again.
In the midst of this desert and these questions.
To lose faith
Is to lose Hope.
I can't save everyone.
I can't convince anyone.
Yet my spirit and my soul grieves for them.
I want to let this be that and
Be content to let them
Live as they choose.
I pray daily
And yet they would turn
Their backs on those prayers.
For reasons I can't grasp.
Is it so easy?
To run from You?
I am mocked for my faith.
In the background and
Then again on endless pages.
Indirectly.
I am seen as a bigot.
A hypocrite.
Two-faced.
By pointing to Christ,
I am seen as the enemy.
I haven't seen anyone else volunteer to
Hang on a cross lately.
It might be,
Nothing against Christians...
Or.
As long as you don't state your views...
We're OK with you.
Perhaps I am simply perusing the other side of things
For the first time in my life.
And after repeated travels into that side,
I am dying for a taste of authenticity again.
For a small taste of the honey of hope on my lips.
A bit of living for something true and deep and rich.
A belief in a love
That transcends understanding.
Of words that jump off of a page
And cut to the heart.
Living for something more.
You may have your hopelessness.
Your reckless living.
I do not walk away because I am better than you.
I walk away because I admit
I need something to hope in besides myself.

"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13