Perspective

Before Paul started his new job we talked every night for at least an hour.

That was great!

Then. He got this job. 4-midnight.

And we don't talk as much. It is strange!

Yet. I think I am learning that even in long-distance relationships, it's OK and even healthy to take time away from each other. Not as in. Don't talk at all. But as in. Focus on what you need to do, and we will catch up on the weekend.

To me. It was RElearning the blessing that my relationship is to me, because I could feel myself getting to that point, where I was just trying to rely on him and I Know I was beginning to take him for granted. There comes a point when you feel that change in yourself - and don't like it.

When I don't get a chance to talk to him, I have to fend for myself emotionally and spiritually. I have to be the adult and be my own person and do what I have to do, without any support or encouragement. At first, I complain. I whine to God a little bit. Sit. And move on with life. Eventually I find myself in a place where I am reminded that my relationship is not nor has ever been a need, but is simply a blessing. Then, when I do get the chance to talk to Paul, I can GIVE. I can GIVE encouragement and support to him. I can laugh with him. We can freely talk. Neither feeling drained and both feeling blessed. Those good days make it all worth it.

Those days when I smile just because I hear his voice. The love God continues to grow in me overflows into our relationship. In His strength, I become stronger and so in my strength our relationship becomes firmer. I always used to think it was weak people who entered relationships - because i thought they think they NEED someone all the time, they need someone to depend on (weak) - YET. To have a truly Christ-centered relationship, BOTH sides must be strong in who they are and in God's love. It is a strong person who can fully love someone and yet remain true to themselves. It is a strong person who remembers the most important key word in a relationship - selflessness - and yet remembers God's grace abounds when either their spouse or significant other fails or when they themselves fail. God is our strength. That is what I am relearning. That's the way it has to be. If God is not our strength, we will surely fail each other and be utterly disappointed. With the strength of His truth, mercy, compassion, grace, sacrifice, and love - we can love each other. Without Him. We only love ourselves.