Whispers

The freezing cold temps provide yet another day of closed schools. Another day without even a chance for work.

It's hard playing this waiting game. Waking up in the morning, hoping for a call, only to find no school yet again. I'm eager to get started. These delays make me feel that perhaps I'll never work and just be a bum, although that isn't really true. It's how I feel though.

Other thoughts for the day: I have found in myself many varying thoughts on relationships lately, mine in particular. I think I am realizing how sometimes, especially after being at long distances from each other, it's hard for me to accept love and the fact that someone else wants to be there for me. Some days I get this thought that I am out for myself, I must fight for myself and let none be too close. Paul has been holding doors for me and paying for us to go eat places and doing things like that. It's weird how I have to remind myself that it's OK to let him do those things. That he is showing love.

There's this stubborn streak in me that I feel to the core. It's the streak that says "I don't need anybody". Yet my heart is louder and says, trust this. Trust this love.

It's a whisper. A whisper I choose to trust.